A Place of Peace and Joy

Written Sep 15, 2013 8:43am

"How is your husband doing?"

I have been asked this question many many times this week - it has been, for us, a testament to how many people care about and are praying for us. God has blessed us with an amazing amount of love and support during this time.

I apologize if my answer to those of you who have asked has been simple and brief. As a person whose energy level is inversely proportional to the number of words I speak each day, I acknowledge that I have not exactly been a verbal fountain of descriptive information. My energy credits are daily going towards caring for my husband, mothering my children, working with my students, and communicating with my God. Please know that we appreciate so very much all of the caring thoughts and sincere prayers and words of encouragement and kind gifts we have received. Each one of you is a part of our journey, helping us to move forward down this long road.

So here is the update:  Everything is going well, it really is. Post surgery healing is quite uneventful, which is ideal, but does not leave much information to report. It's kind of like when you have a new baby - they don't do a whole lot other than eat, poop, and sleep. If they do these three things, life is happy - if one thing gets out of whack, life is a bit stormy. I am happy to report that all three boxes have a check mark here at Rehab Central! Activity level is extremely limited and  stamina is low. A generous number of medications  help control discomfort and symptoms. Twelve short walks are required around the house or yard each day, and finding the right balance of how much to do during each active period  has been challenging, but we are accomplishing this goal nearly every day. I have been providing protein to keep things healing, fiber to keep things moving, and carbs to keep energy for walking. The little kids have been great about being sent off to various places for respite care quite often so that the house remains quieter during these initial weeks. The big kids have taken on some extra responsibilities to help me out whenever I have needed them to. Each kid takes turns sitting with their dad when he is awake, keeping him connected with their school lives and various activities, and distracting him when being tired and sick gets a little boring... but I have to point out, when someone is recovering from brain surgery, boring is ideal!

Sometimes, as a wife who is also a nurse, the thoughts of possible complications that could occur can make me a little anxious... okay, more like a lot! In response to these musings, I try to deliberately stop and thank God for the boring days and uneventful details of my husband's recovery. I try not to worry about what could happen, and instead focus on what is happening. I try to contemplate the many, many little ways that God has shown Himself throughout these last couple of months. I try to spend time thanking God for the number of my prayers He has answered with exactly the answer I was looking for, and also for the times He has answered with a response that I'd never have imagined, but makes perfect sense in hindsight. 

What I know for sure is that God has asked us to look to Him first. Before we consider any other thought or idea, we need to consider Him. By communicating with Him daily, by always acknowledging His presence in our lives, by trusting Him to perfectly control all of our circumstances - all of these things are a part of the process of seeking God first. When we stand with God, His character reflects onto us, and we experience the power of His influence on our reactions and on our attitudes. For me, being able to trade my naturally flawed inclination towards negativity and emotional ups and downs for the presence of God's positive and unchanging attitude - that is an amazing and supernatural influence that brings me to a place of peace and joy that I could never find on my own. It is a place I crave to be and will daily seek to find.

"Our hearts are in the things to which we devote ourselves, the things we spend our time pursuing... Every day another 24 hours or 1,440 minutes or 86,400 seconds is credited to our account, and we have to spend them. Whether we are a billionaire or a dirt farmer, except for those who die that day, we all have the same amount of time... how we spend it shows where our heart is." - John W. Ritenbaugh

"Can all your worries add a single moment to your life? ...if God cares so wonderfully for wildflowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, He will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith? ...your heavenly Father already knows all your needs. Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and He will give you everything you need. So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today."
- Matthew 6:27,30, 32b-34